fajrdrako: ([Heroes] - Peter)
[personal profile] fajrdrako


I spent most of the afternoon doing research in the National Library of Canada. I've been there before, but not for many years. I used to go when I was an undergraduate at Carleton University, and I remember they made me jump through hoops to get the authorization to go in. I was left thinking it was an elitist place that probably wouldn't let me in.

But, encouraged yesterday by [livejournal.com profile] maaseru and John, I went today and got a card without much hassle, using my passport as identification. I then spent time reading a book that has always fascinated me, L'Histoire de Guillaume le Maréchal. I have read it before, but really don't remember as much as I might; the only printed version, a three-volume set from 1891, is difficult to find, and is fragile. It is more than 19,000 lines of Anglo-Norman verse, and so is difficult to read quickly.

I knew the National Library had a copy, because I'd got it once on Interlibrary Loan through the Public Library. (But they wouldn't let me take it home. The nerve.) When I asked for it this morning the library expressed doubt. "We don't usually handle that kind of material," she said. "We're mandated to carry Canadian history, you know." I couldn't tell whether she was dissing my unpatriotic study of European history, or apologizing for the library's insufficiencies. I refrained from saying, "How chauvinistic of you." They did, of course, have the book.

Because it is fragile, I had to read it in room 25, wearing white gloves (which they provided), and use of pens is not allowed. Luckily, I'd put a good pencil into my bag this morning, somewhat by accident rather than good planning.

I luxuriated in the place. I'm used to the Ottawa Public Library - a good place, don't get me wrong, but it's crowded with books and people and the air conditioning seldom seems quite right and the librarians are always busy. In the National Library, there is a hush. The air conditioning is perfect - and that's important, since it was ([livejournal.com profile] maaseru tells me) 40-something degrees Celsius outdoors today, or 106o Fahrenheit. But in this cool, not-too-bright, not-to-dim room with its high ceilings and a view of the Ottawa River through its floor-to-ceilng windows with vertical blinds, I felt as if I was in an ivory tower. The table I was working at was maybe 10' by 15', and I had it all to myself. There was a space of about 10' between each table and the next, and no more than three or four people working in the whole huge room at any one time. Everything seemed fresh and clean and spacious and artistic.

I loved it. I worked until my eyes started to blur and my brain balked at understanding Anglo-Norman and the muscles of my pencil-wielding hand started to ache.

The good part? My card is valid for a whole year.

Makes me feel, if only temporarily, like the real scholar I want to be.

I took some pictures when I was leaving, just for the fun of it.

First,

The statue outside the National Library. It is called "The Secret Bench of Knowledge", and is by Toronto artist Lea Vivot.
Besides being a lovely statue, it has a delightful history.


~ ~ ~



A fountain in the garden to the left of the main doors.


~ ~ ~



"The Secret Bench of Knowledge" as seen from the garden,
with the entrance to the National Library to the left of the picture.
The person sitting on the bench is real, not part of the sculpture -
she was waiting for someone to pick her up.



Date: 2007-08-03 01:11 am (UTC)
msilverstar: (Default)
From: [personal profile] msilverstar
I love that book! UC Berkeley let me take it out for weeks at a time. A large part of my senior thesis was based on it.

Huh, I just realized that my thesis was on medieval fandom! Once I found out that right after the Chanson de Roland, the most popular boy's names were Roland and Oliver, I was on a roll. My thesis was on the feedback loop between secular literature and secular culture, esp. including William Marshall and Le Chevalier de la Charette (Chretien's Lancelot). William's life imitated art and the stories imitated his life...

Date: 2007-08-03 02:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
Reposting due to a few egregious typos - sorry!

I love that book!

Egad, so do I! And you're the first other person I've met who has read it, though I've known people who have read parts of it. (And may have read the whole thing since I last discussed it with them, I don't know.) Yes, I was able to take it out from the library of King's College when I was studying there - that was wonderful. Much easier there than here.

Forgive my ignorance, but what is a senior thesis? Is that a thesis you have to write to get a B.A.? Or does it mean something else? I thought 'senior' meant last year of high school in the U.S., but I would be surprised if they had you writing about an Anglo-Norman biographical poem in high school.

Once I found out that right after the Chanson de Roland, the most popular boy's names were Roland and Oliver, I was on a roll.

How wonderful! I believe I knew that already - an idea of infinite pleasure. I remember once noticing young males in northern Italy in the 14th century with names like "Arturo" and "Pandragone" because of the popularity of the Arthurian legends. I love it when that happens! Or even just tracing the history of names... the man I am researching, Aimery de Lusignan, was the son of a woman named Burgundia... and then he named his daughter Burgundia. It's such fun to see patterns like that.

I wonder if, in the mid-9th century or whenever it was, there were suddenly a bunch of kids named Beowulf and Grendel?

My thesis was on the feedback loop between secular literature and secular culture

Oh wow. It might be presumptuous of me to ask this, but may I read your thesis? It sounds fascinating. Was this in history or literature or both?

Chretien's Lancelot

I have never read Chretien and I really believe I should. He's smack in the middle of my time and consorted with people I am working on. I should read it soon. I am currently rereading the Lais of Marie de France.

William's life imitated art

It certainly did! He was practically sans peur et sans reproche, and made into the model of the preux chevalier. He's all the more endearing (I think) because sometimes his personal non-typical point of view appears in the text, or his sense of humour. I do like William - even though I've just been reading about him bitterly fighting the guys I'm researching. Have you read the book Georges Duby wrote about him?


Date: 2007-08-03 03:23 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
I've got the paperback of Chrétien's romances. The editor's a former St As prof of French, and takes the view that Le Chevalier de la Charette (the Lancelot story) is a spoof. Helen Nicholson relates his Grail romance (the first on the subject) to Outremer politics, and says it's an allegory of Philip of Flander's abortive career in Outremer. The maimed king is, of course, Baldwin IV.

Date: 2007-08-03 08:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
Helen Nicholson relates his Grail romance (the first on the subject) to Outremer politics, and says it's an allegory of Philip of Flander's abortive career in Outremer.

Oh, how cool!

Is there an edition you'd recommend? is the paperback in English or French?

Date: 2007-08-03 08:57 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
The paperback's in English: it's the D D R Owen translation (http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?r=1&r=1&EAN=9780460873895).
Helen's comments on Perceval are here (http://homepage.ntlworld.com/nigel.nicholson/hn/CrusadeFAQs/T_and_G feed.html): she talks about the political allegory in the Grail legends.

Date: 2007-08-03 09:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
Thank you!

I'm about to go for a walk (despite the heat) and if I go by a second hand bookstore - i.e., if I get that far - I'll see if they have it. Hard to guess the odds.

Date: 2007-08-03 09:27 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
You can certainly get it online.

Date: 2007-08-04 12:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
So I see. Even Gutenberg has it. I'd rather read hard copy, though; I've ordered it from the library.

Date: 2007-08-04 01:31 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
I meant ordering it from a shop online. The Gutenberg and other online versions will be from old translations. Not always good.

Date: 2007-08-04 03:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
The library has the D.D.R. Owen version, which is what I want. So it's the best of all worlds.

Date: 2007-08-04 03:23 pm (UTC)

Date: 2007-08-03 09:06 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
My boy is called after 2 of his uncles (his mother's half-brother, the King of Germany, and her full brother, the Bishop of Passau). I suspect his parents had older children that died, as (given the family pattern of the eldest being named for the paternal grandfather) the eldest should have been a Renier, not a William (the father's name). As it was, the name Renier was used for the youngest boy, born c. 1162.

Date: 2007-08-03 09:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
Names did get switched and reused - which is one of the reasons it has been difficult to sort out the Hughs and Geoffreys of the Lusignan family. I love looking at the patterns, though.

Date: 2007-08-03 09:29 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
As the parents married c. 1133, one would expect more older ones. Neither William nor Conrad seem to have been born pre-1140-ish, given that no-one mentions them until the late '50s-early '60s at the earliest.

Date: 2007-08-04 12:50 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
Funny, I have the same pattern in the Lusignan family where, as far as I could see, at least two of the Lusignan women waited a decade (or more) after marriage to have children. Was this an infertility problem? Or are the marriage dates wrong? Or did they have some sort of medieval birth control? I find it somewhat perplexing.

Date: 2007-08-04 01:29 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
Certainly not birth control. (The only reliable mediæval method I know was called 'going on crusade'!)
It's most likely that there were miscarriages or children who died in infancy. Another possibility is that some of the marriage contracts were made when the brides were children.

Date: 2007-08-04 03:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
The only reliable mediæval method I know was called 'going on crusade'!

LOL!

Another possibility is that some of the marriage contracts were made when the brides were children.

Yes, that makes sense, too. Married at 8 or so - it would make sense for child-bearing not to begin for a decade or more. Thank you, that's a very plausible explanation: it also means, quite sensibly, that if they were married in, say, 1120, they weren't necessarily 20 years old and therefore weren't still bearing children late in their 40s (which looks odd); they could have been a good decade younger.

Moreover, given the uncertainties and warfares of their time, early marriage or betrothal makes good sense too, for military, political, and familiar alliances. I was just reading the perfect example of this in Guillaume le Marechale where a dispute was settled when Earl Patrick's sister Sibile (another Sybilla!) married William's father as part of the political settlement. He age of course is not mentioned, but it's hardly relevant: the families were, as the writer assures us, on good terms from then on.

Obviously this can backfire - we both know a bunch of bad marriages where the situation was either worsened or just not helped by the husband's treatment of the bride. (I'm thinking here of the example of Baldwin I and Adelaide of Sicily, which left the Sicilians resentful for numerous reasons. There are of course other examples.)

Date: 2007-08-04 04:34 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
LOL!

I can't help but think that the Second Crusade (the 'big family excursion') was organised by all the women getting their heads together so they could have some respite from child-bearing.

Yes, that makes sense, too. Married at 8 or so - it would make sense for child-bearing not to begin for a decade or more. Thank you, that's a very plausible explanation: it also means, quite sensibly, that if they were married in, say, 1120, they weren't necessarily 20 years old and therefore weren't still bearing children late in their 40s (which looks odd); they could have been a good decade younger.

Although a lot of them clearly were bearing children well into their late 40s (as were some of my 19C ancestresses: my youngest great-grand-uncle was born when his Mum was about 46, in the early 1830s). Conrad's parents were both younger children of his grandmothers' second marriages: Gisela and Jutte must have been well over 40 at the time.

I'm thinking here of the example of Baldwin I and Adelaide of Sicily, which left the Sicilians resentful for numerous reasons.

Adelaide was dowager Queen of Sicily. By birth she was Adelaide of Savona/del Vasto, another branch of the Aleramici. She's some sort of cousin of the Montferrats.

Date: 2007-08-04 05:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
the Second Crusade ... was organised by all the women getting their heads together so they could have some respite from child-bearing.

Not to mention getting the men out from underfoot all the time. Running the households must have been somewhat easier without the menfolk interfering.

a lot of them clearly were bearing children well into their late 40s

Yes, but I was puzzling over the demographics and things make more sense when you postulate early marriages for at least some of them. If only we had more birth dates of women.

She's some sort of cousin of the Montferrats.

I'm tempted to say, "Wasn't everyone?" Very cool!

Date: 2007-08-04 06:06 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
Yes, but I was puzzling over the demographics and things make more sense when you postulate early marriages for at least some of them. If only we had more birth dates of women.

Jutta von Babenberg was probably born c. 1118 (when her mother was about 45), so was certainly in her teens by 1133, when she first appears as William's wife, in a donation to the Abbey of Locez (Lucedio). Her youngest children, Renier and Azalais, were born in the early 1160s.

I'm tempted to say, "Wasn't everyone?" Very cool!

There are several branches of the Aleramici in NW Italy. Some of them intermarried. They share a common ancestor, Aleramo, in the mid-10C. (I've visited his tomb at Grassan (Grazzano Badoglio).)

Date: 2007-08-03 09:32 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
Funny how some people (like William, or indeed Richard) get all the long-term hype, and others, after a brief flowering of songs about them, get chucked on the scrapheap…

Date: 2007-08-04 12:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
I consider it my mission in life to do something about this.

Date: 2007-08-04 01:48 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
Ditto!
It just appalls me how Conrad has been treated in particular.

Date: 2007-08-04 02:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
He's a particularly blatant example, but at the moment I am tempted to go an a wild rant about how the Lusignans have been treated by historians.

Date: 2007-08-04 03:17 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
Mind, they do at least get to be stars of their own kingdom for a few centuries!

Date: 2007-08-04 03:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
Yes, which isn't bad. So I can look on the bad press in which they were evil brigands as being the place from which they started. I do note that the later you get in history, the more respectable they become as the ruling dynasty of Cyprus.

And really, the 'felon' stage where I have currently been reading about them in Guillaume le Marchal, that isn't even just their beginnings, they already had a castle and lands and a certain prestige, and the military clout to take on kings (like Louis) and emperors (like Henri Plantagenet) - just not enough clout to win against them!

Date: 2007-08-04 04:37 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
and the military clout to take on kings (like Louis) and emperors (like Henri Plantagenet) - just not enough clout to win against them!

I think the moral of the story is, don't ruffle the feathers of the big boys… Keep your head down, and go for the pickings after they've beaten someone else up.

Date: 2007-08-04 06:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
I think the moral of the story is, don't ruffle the feathers of the big boys…

They probably thought it was the only game in town! But yes, it's quite a challenge to take on the Planatagenets at their height - no wonder a bunch of them decamped to Outremer - fighting Turks must have seemed so much simpler.

Date: 2007-08-04 06:07 pm (UTC)

Date: 2007-08-03 01:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] walkingowl.livejournal.com
Real Scholar, indeed. Outward trappings to reflect the inner truth!

The white cotton gloves... gad, to be able to handle a book that actually needs this, such a joy it must have been. Think of all the other hands that have held it. The ones who read it... what colors were their eyes?

I smile. I love such stuff.

I gently disagree with your caption: the person sitting on the bench is real, but she is not "not part of the sculpture," mia kara -- as soon as she sat, she became part of the sculpture. Was that not part of the entire intention of the art? hm

Hearing about being inside a wonderful library on a steaming-hot day was as refreshing for me, I think, as it must have been for you to have been there.

By the way: do you know that your digital camera can take pictures of the book's pages? There is a setting it has (I assume this; maybe it does not have it) called "macro." Macro allows you to hold the lens closer than usual without getting you any distortion. Think about it. Leaves from the book as screensavers....

Date: 2007-08-03 02:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
Well, truthfully, I suspect not many other people have read this book in the past 5 years, possibly even the past century. Not many people try to read Anglo-Norman, and not many people are as obsessed with the 12th century as I am. There's a similar book at the Carleton U library, where I suspect I am the only person who has ever read it. Well... fine by me.

It isn't fragile because it's been read a lot, but because it's old and paper gets brittle and the glue in bindings falls apart.

I don't know what colours the eyes of the other readers were, but I'd love to know the eye colour of the Lusignan brothers I am researching.

Well, yes, she was part of the sculpture but not a part the artist put there. I was myself part of the sculpture when I sat there, a little while later.

My camera lacks settings. My camera is an ignoramus of the camera world, which is what happens when you buy the cheapest model Costco has. One day, when I have a little money, I will get a better camera. I did fantasize a little about having the ability to do that. Some day, maybe!

Date: 2007-08-08 01:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] walkingowl.livejournal.com
I suspect I am the only person who has ever read it. Well... fine by me.

Indeed. I love the very image of such a thing.

My campus library has a book sale every spring; last year, for one dollar, I bought an unabridged Webster's dictionary, 1960 ... which I recognized as the dictionary that had sat on the pedestel in the main library hall 25 years ago, when I was an undergraduate here. O, the thoguhts it brought to mind!

Well, yes, she was part of the sculpture but not a part the artist put there. I was myself part of the sculpture when I sat there, a little while later.

Hmmm... performance art. Think of a video camera trained on this bench all day. (If people can sell eight-hour videos of a fishbowl, well...!)

My camera lacks settings... One day, when I have a little money, I will get a better camera...

Costco, hm? What I have here that compares -- Best Buy. What would you say to a Canon 5-pixel with zoom lens and settings, for $180 US? I know, still a lot of money. Want me to look into it for you? Remember the Wolverine phone: there could be a great deal out there somewhere, eh?

Date: 2007-08-08 01:26 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
An eight-hour video of a fishbowl sounds like a screensaver. I do have a video of a fire burning in a fireplace - it's fun to play. Especially in December.

I'm not going to buy a camera at any price until I've paid off all my debts!

Date: 2007-08-08 01:31 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] walkingowl.livejournal.com
I know what you mean. I browse DVD sets but know I need to put that off indefinitely, no matter how attractive the price. Nice to think about, tho'.

Back in the early 1990s, I somehow ran across a program (I think it was on one of the transponders on one of Canada's two ANIK television satellites) showing odd stuff from local cable-TV channels around the world. One from Germany had a film clip for insomniacs, which played all night long: it was a handful of actors dressed up to look like sheep, playing leap-frog with each other from left to right across the screen... nonstop... and it was strangely addictive....

Date: 2007-08-08 01:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
Leap-frogging sheep actors? My goodness. Brings to mind 200 sheep in steel helmets. (Dunnett reference.)

There are DVD sets I'd like too, but it's like with books: I already have more than I have time to read or watch. This is the time to not buy things.

Date: 2007-08-03 06:17 am (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
L'Histoire de Guillaume le Maréchal is downloadable for free as a pdf in 3 vols at Gallica (http://gallica.bnf.fr/). I have it on computer, and can send on disc if you want to have it to play with at home!

Date: 2007-08-03 01:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
My goodness yes, it would be wonderful to have it on my computer. It would be heaven. Much as I like the National Gallery - it would be great to be able to read it at home. I poked at the site but couldn't figure out how to do a search for it - am I being slow there? (Fascinating site, though.) I don't suppose they also have an Anglo-Norman dictionary for some of the more elusive words? I can usually read it easily enough just by reading phonetically, but sometimes I think, "Suppose I guess wrong?" I know Paul Meyer guessed wrong a few times!

Date: 2007-08-03 03:14 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
To search Gallica, go to "Recherche", enter your search terms, then click, and it comes up with a list. You click on the item you want, and "télécharger" means "Download". It can be slow, though. I can send you the pdfs on a CD-ROM.

For Anglo-Norman/Old French, I use The Anglo-Norman On-Line Hub (http://www.anglo-norman.net/), which has a dictionary for look-ups.

Date: 2007-08-03 08:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
I found it! And yes, I had to guess at "télécharger"; it was odd to think that I'm more familiar and comfortable with 'age of chivalry' French than 'computer age' French. But it's all a matter of what I've practised.

Thank you for the Anglo-Norman dictionary link! It looks like exactly what I need for those times I either can't guess a word, or misinterpret enough to find that three or four lines of the verse are opaque, and I'm left thinking, "What are they doing? and why?"

Date: 2007-08-03 08:58 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
I have put the books on CD for you, and will post!

Date: 2007-08-03 09:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
Thank you! Infinite thanks!

I'd say that in Anglo-Norman, if only I could think how...

Are you familiar with the Castello di Avio?

Date: 2007-08-03 09:23 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
No, but I gather, from a quick Google, that it has nice wall-paintings.

Date: 2007-08-04 12:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
So it does! I'd never heard of it (and really must read more Italian history!) but I came across a picture of it on a calendar and was impressed.

Date: 2007-08-04 01:42 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
I recommend the Castelli Aperti (http://www.castelliaperti.it/welcome_eng.lasso) website and newsletter. Literally 'Open Castles', it covers Monferrato, Saluzzo, & c.

Date: 2007-08-04 02:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
thank you - I'll check that out.

Date: 2007-08-04 03:25 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
It's pretty! (But things from Monferrato tend to be pretty including its princes…)

I have posted the CD-ROM today.

Date: 2007-08-04 03:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
things from Monferrato tend to be pretty

I think so. It ties together several of my passions - cultured knights, Italian culture, northern Italy, castles, and Outremer - what could be better?

I have posted the CD-ROM today.

Big smile and happy dance. Even the budgies are happy about it. (Or about something.)

Re budgies: [livejournal.com profile] maaseru is babysitting a friend's two little budgies. They are silent. Silent. They hardly chirp. They never squawk or screech. Accustomed to my cheery, noisy little hellions as I am, I find this incredible. How can this be? Aren't quiet budgies a contradiction in terms? Are they feathery impostors from another species?

Date: 2007-08-04 04:39 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
Re budgies: maaseru is babysitting a friend's two little budgies. They are silent. Silent. They hardly chirp. They never squawk or screech. Accustomed to my cheery, noisy little hellions as I am, I find this incredible. How can this be? Aren't quiet budgies a contradiction in terms? Are they feathery impostors from another species?

It may mean they're plotting something… You have been warned. ;-D

Date: 2007-08-04 04:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
Oh dear. Yes. I think you might be on to something there. I will warn [livejournal.com profile] maaseru.

Date: 2007-08-04 05:02 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
Never, ever trust a quiet budgie. Or turn your back on it.

Date: 2007-08-03 06:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wijsgeer.livejournal.com
when you mentioned feeling like a real scholar I was reminded of Harriet's musings in Gaudy Night, where she wonders if she should have chosen the academic way and not the crime writer one.

Date: 2007-08-03 01:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
I can relate to that question. Sometimes I really wonder how and why I got away from academia and I miss it terribly. Other times I think my reasons for it (i.e., wanting to be able to pay the rent and eat) were good ones. It is a path not travelled that I now regret. I think a good part of my reason was the fear I wasn't good enough, and I think now that I would have been - it was poor health rather than incapacity for the work that derailed me. Or someting.

In any case, the world of the scholar still tempts me.

Date: 2007-08-03 01:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wijsgeer.livejournal.com
yes, I can also relate. For me bad health is preventing me from even trying. I cannot even manage my master's thesis. When I read Harriet's thought I felt so much recognition.

But as for the path not traveled, I hope the path you did do brought it's own pleasures with it?

Date: 2007-08-03 01:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
I cannot even manage my master's thesis.

Yeah. I managed that one, though I had to delay it by six months due to illness. Frustrating, especially when I look back. At the time it was a matter of taking one day at a time; but I think now, that on recovery, I should have done everything I could to get back into a doctoral programme. I suppose the question is: if I feel that way, what's stopping me now? Answer: money. The sense that I've been away from it for too long. Sheer funk.

I hope the path you did do brought it's own pleasures with it?

Oh, yes, it's been fun working in theatre, and I'm not really complaining about my life. It isn't what I would have chosen ideally, but it's been fun, certainly, with good friends and lots of stimulating ideas to play with. Not to mention having history books to read. But if anyone seems suited by temperament and interest to be an academic, it's me. I was once proud of my undersanding of the 12th century. Now I have... less to be proud of.



Date: 2007-08-03 03:17 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
But if anyone seems suited by temperament and interest to be an academic, it's me.

Me too. Unfortunately, the economic/political climate was against me. A casualty of Thatcherism. 4 years of full-time paid work in the 14 years since finishing PhD.

I'm not a violent person, but the people who claim that poverty is a virtue need their heads kicking in.

Date: 2007-08-03 08:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
It's a weird world out there, and I am under no illusion that having a PhD would better my life economically. Which is one of the reasons I've never done it. Doesn't mean I don't think it's worth doing, though.

Date: 2007-08-03 09:10 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
I resent the fact that most of the members of my family who have more money than I do are under-educated, uncultured and tasteless. If I had their money, I'd make far better use of it.

Date: 2007-08-03 09:26 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
I'm still reeling from a wedding-video: cousin's beautician daughter (an animated Barbie in looks and personality) getting hitched at one of these special resorts in Jamaica. Peroxide hair and mahogany suntan. Dare I use the word "chav"?!

Date: 2007-08-03 11:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
Chuckle. Can't say I feel envious. Euw!

Date: 2007-08-04 08:35 am (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
Exactly. Tasteless nouveau riche.
I am resigned to being shabby-genteel.

Date: 2007-08-04 12:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
I aspire to a kind of ascetic-chic stylishness that bypasses filthy lucre and goes staight to insirational bohemianism.

This means I improvise.

The effect is probably the same as shabby-genteel but it has aspirations of grandeur.

Date: 2007-08-04 03:19 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
Much the same here. Ageing New Romantic with Goth-ette tendencies.

Date: 2007-08-04 03:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
Yes, and I think it's terrific! I suspect we'd both set our own styles regardless of how much money we had. Only maybe we'd shop at thrift stores less.

Date: 2007-08-04 03:27 pm (UTC)
ext_120533: Deseine's terracotta bust of Max Robespierre (Default)
From: [identity profile] silverwhistle.livejournal.com
Yes. There are dresses in proper Goth shops that I would love to be able to afford… Velvet and lace, that make you feel like a princess.

Date: 2007-08-04 03:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fajrdrako.livejournal.com
Ahh, wouldn't that be great? I know I could sew things like this, but I'm not sure I could afford to do so, and I don't want to spend the time.

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