(no subject)

[fajrdrako]

Last night Lisa, Lynne and I were doing an exercise that involved looking at our lives (past and future) in five year segments, noting what was significant about each five-year span, and what we intended to do in each five-year span in future. The future part turned out to be fun.... lots of travel involved for me, starting with Malta next year. Great sucesses, too. The same successes I wanted when I was five, or ten, or fifteen. I don't change much.

But doing the exercise gave me a surge of optimism. If I plan things right... maybe it will work. Maybe I can twist my life around to where I want it to be. We shall see!

I read Gotham Central before going to bed. That's an incredibly good comic: taking the realism of a police procedural and applying it to the world of Gotham City - puts a whole new slant on things, but it's still a character-based study of the lives of cops. I dropped District X because I had got it in the hope it would be similar, and it looked bad in comparison. And of course I like it that Montoya is gay. Comics are just so cool sometimes.

I also read the beginning of From Eroica With Love, which is at last being printed in English. I was again amazed how different the beginning was from the stories which followed - a totally different theme and style. No one would be paying attention if it hadn't changed, I think. I love Dorian's first appearance - claiming the spotlight as always.

Then last night I dreamed I was discussing Lost with someone. Said I was afraid to love Sayid too much in case he turned out to be a villain. Heh - when I'm awake I have no such qualms about loving characters. villainous or otherwise. I like to write about Lionel Luthor, for goodness sake!

Comments

[rivier.livejournal.com]

That's an intriguing idea - I've done the planning-forward exercise before, but not really looked back at my life in such a systematic way. Probably because I'd be spending so much time covering my eyes and wincing at all the grisly memories.

Which is an even better reason for sitting down and assessing it. I'm not unhappy with where I am now, even though it's in no way at all resembled a straight path to get here. Impossible to even start to guess where I'd be if tyhings had gone as I'd expected at the crucial points.

And ah, another Lost fan. I have all the eps to date pulled down to my PC... and can't bring myself to watch. Everyone is going so crazy for the show - don't know if I'm more scaredthat I won't like it, or that I'll be as besotted as the rest of my f-list. I have no more room in my head / heart / hard drive!

[fajrdrako.livejournal.com]

not really looked back at my life in such a systematic way. Probably because I'd be spending so much time covering my eyes and wincing at all the grisly memories.

I would have feared that too, but it turned out that when I did it systematically, the bad memories looked brief - severe but ephemeral. Yes, I winced, but after wincing, there was a sort of interesting disinvolvement possible.

Things have never gone as I expected, never. Not in any way. And I sometimes think that if things were worse for me now, I'd feel more motivation to change for the better, which would be a good thing. As it is - I tend to let things slide, deal with the parts of my life that dissatisfy me by being philosophical about them - but not doing anything to improve them. I'm not sure this is a good approach. It isn't a bad approach, but can't I do better?

As for Lost, I can't vouch for your time or your hard drive, but I'd say - go for it, if you like something intriguing and different in mood. I find it mesmerizing - and I am braced for a letdown at any time, but I don't really care. I love a show where you can't take things for granted, and last week's episode (#4) did a lot to give me faith in the show, to believe they know what they are doing.