New Year's Resolutions...

Some people don't like New Year's Resolutions. Many consider them futile - frustrating because no one keeps them for more than a few days or weeks in to the new year. If that.

Myself, I love them. In fact, I love them so much I keep making them all year - re-analyzing them and re-prioretizing them regularly. It's like an ongoing experiment. It's like a game. I revise the list, I refine it, I play with it; maybe half gets abandoned, maybe half becomes part of my daily life. it evolves. I've been doing this for several years now, as a sort of ongoing project to save myself from the illness and depression that was consuming me.

Now, I don't know if it's conscious effort that has made the difference, or dumb luck, or hormonal dice-shots, but my life has improved so much that I am incredulous. I didn't believe I would ever achieve this level of happiness again. It has nothing to do with my circumstances, which haven't changed.

The list composed on January 1st has a special symbolic significance. I wasn't going to post my New Year's Resolutions this year, because they are more than usually personal... or, rather, more than usually important to me. But then I thought, what the heck: no one will understand the more personal angles, which are psychological anyway.

So here you have it: my official list of 2006 resolutions:

1. Follow fitness program, including weights and yoga.


2. Get sufficient sleep. (This is the really difficult one.)


3. Write.


4. Floss teeth daily.


5. Keep dishes washed.


6. Enjoy life.


7. Be mindful.


8. Live without greed or envy.


9. Dance every day.


10. Finish what I start.

That last one is thanks to maaseru, who found it in a list of prayers for INFP personalities: "Dear God, please help me to finish what I...." Don't even ask me about the hundreds of WIPs on my hard drive.

For the time being, "be mindful" means: don't be scattered; focus on priorities.

The Holy Blood and the Holy Grail...

A while ago when everyone I knew was reading The Da Vinci Code, someone asked to borrow my copy of The Holy Blood and the Holy Grail. I said sure, but it was packed away somewhere, I'd give it to them when I found it.

So I found it, and now I can't remember who I was talking to. Does anyone here remember that conversation with me? Anyone here want to borrow it?

Change...

It's not that some people have willpower and some don't. It's that some people are ready to change and others are not. - James Gordon

I assume this is not the Jim Gordon of Batman comics. Or maybe it is - it's the kind of thing he might say!

So do I think it is true? I think it is... interesting to think about. What makes it possible for some people to change in certain ways, and others not at all? Or is it that sometimes any individual will be willing and able to change and at other times, not? How much control do we have over our personalities and our lives? I hope and believe I can change myself for the better, in ways I want to change; but I don't think for a moment I'll be able to change my basic personality patterns. Nor would I want to.

Is that always true?